Posted by: expectingamiracle | December 1, 2008

18 weeks

I have a few stats and things to remember from my last OB appointment on Tuesday.  I gained 5 lbs from my last visit!  Woohoo!  My OB thought some of the weight might have been extra clothes (it’s cold) but she could see a difference in my belly as well.  I’m gaining, so that makes me happy.  I got to hear the heartbeat again but I didn’t think to ask what the rate was until I was checking out.  She said it was in the 140s and then when I was talking, it jumped into the 150s.  I told my husband and he commented that baby is already listening to its mommy.  I told my mom about it (and what my husband said) and she laughed and said “yes, but don’t get used to it”.

I’m hoping to have my big ultrasound on Dec. 17 but I’m waiting for the clinic to call me back.  I’m mostly excited just to see the baby and know that everything looks okay.  It’s kind of odd because I thought I’d be more anxious to find out the gender.  I DO want to know and I AM curious but for some reason I am content to wait.  I think it’s just so cool to feel movement that just that is enough for me.  I’ve gone from thinking I was pretty sure I was feeling movement at 16 weeks and now at 18 weeks I feel baby kick several times throughout the day.  Maybe 3 or 4 times a day I will feel maybe 3 kicks or so each time.  I love feeling those little pokes in there; makes me smile every time and often I’ll talk to baby when he/she starts moving.  My doctor did say it was a bit early to feel them, but she wasn’t surprised because of my thinness.  So I guess that paid off in that way.

Thanksgiving was good.  It was really nice to be pregnant and get to show off my little belly.  My younger brother was so cute, when I told him baby was moving he put his hand on my belly to try and feel it.   Also, I was telling him about how I couldn’t fit in regular pants anymore and his comment was, “So you have to get those… fat people mother pants?  Oh, maternity clothes!  That’s what they are called!”  I just died laughing, as did SIL (brother’s new wife). 

So yup, lots of good food and a few late night heart to hearts with my MIL, which was nice.  We talked baby things and I even told her when we started discussing baby names, that we had named our lost baby Thomas Shaw.  It’s not something I have shared with a lot of people “in real life” so it meant a lot to me to feel like I could tell her that without worrying that it would seem odd. 

I miss him tonight.  It’s a combination of things.  Talking to MIL about him.  Clipping off some nandina berries at MIL’s and thinking about his statue next to the nandina bushes at our house.  Finding his Christmas ornament when I went through Christmas things.  It’s odd to think though, that if I hadn’t lost him, in all likelihood, I wouldn’t be pregnant with this little one.  I wish there was some way I could have had them both.  I can’t though, so all I can do is to treasure this one I have now just as much as I can, to be grateful for every little movement I feel and know just how lucky I am.

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Responses

  1. It sounds like you had a wonderful weekend. It’s always nice to have those rare “share your feelings” kinds of chats. (Not everyone gets along with their MIL, so it’s especially nice that you could have one with her. Congrats on the 5 pounds too! Once you get further along, hopefully it won’t be so hard to put on weight.

  2. Glad you had a good appointment and holiday!


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