Posted by: expectingamiracle | September 18, 2008

The Best News

I cried in my car on the way there.  Because I was scared.  Because it was exactly one year from when I heard the words “I’m sorry, there is no heartbeat”.  Because I still wish with all my heart that I had my first baby in my arms.

My husband and I waited nervously in the room, waiting.  We made jokes about the dildo cam.  I read the phamplet on genetic disorders in the Ashkenazi Jewish population.

She came in, asked a few questions and soon, we had our answer.  A baby.  A heartbeat.  She turned the screen and I looked up to see the smile on my husband’s face.  She turned the screen towards me and I saw our baby.  So big, compared to the size Thomas was.  A little heart beating.  She turned on the doppler and we heard the heartbeat.  Without a doubt, the most amazing sound I’ve ever heard.

Baby is measuring perfectly.  1.5 cm CRL.  Heartrate 162. 

My RE looked slightly horrified when my husband told her that it was exactly a year from when we found out our first baby died.  And she said she was glad she could give us good news.  We discussed my miscarriage and the problems I had back then (baby’s development was slow, gestational sac too small) and she said this was a whole new ballgame. 

I feel good.  I know losses can and do happen, even after perfect ultrasounds.  But I feel like we’ve already crossed so many hurdles that we never did last time.  Everything looks perfect and you can’t ask for better than that.  I truly feel what I only dared to hope before…that I will hold this little one in my arms in May.

7 weeks, 4 days.  Baby is outlined in the 2nd picture with the yolk sac directly above.

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Responses

  1. I’m so glad for you…

    Coach Louise

    http://www.lifebalanceinfertilitycoach.wordpress.com

  2. Hooray! Hooray! I’m so happy for you. September 18th ….REDEEMING DAY!

  3. This! This! It makes me so happy I feel like crying.

    Fantabulous….the best news evah!!!

  4. I am so glad you had a good appointment! Thats a perfect little bean there!

  5. Congratulations to you. Those are GORGEOUS ultrasound photos you have there! I’ll keep my fingers crossed for you and hope that everything continues in the right direction. If you believe in signs and/or believe in God, you might take it as a good sign that the ultrasound was on such a sad day for you in order to continue your healing process and help you to have happy memories of that day in the future, rather than sad ones.

  6. […] 2 years ago to the day, I saw Matthew for the first time. https://expectingamiracle.wordpress.com/2008/09/18/the-best-news/ […]


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